TOW: the Boobies

Joey: is visited by his father, Joey Sr (Robert Costanzo). Joey Sr. is on the phone, saying romantic things. Joey assumes it's his mom and takes the phone from his dad. Joey learns that his dad has a mistress, Ronnie (Lee Garlington), a pet mortician. They've been together six years. Joey is furious. He and Chandler leave Monica and Rachel's one night to find a woman waiting outside their apartment. It's the mistress, looking for Joey Sr. Ronnie ends up staying over; Joey makes his father and Ronnie sleep in separate rooms, with he and Chandler taking the couch. Before bed, Joey tells his dad to end it with Ronnie or tell his mom what's going on. Joey tells Chandler he's worried he'll end up being like his father, but Chandler reassures him. The next day Joey's mom (Brenda Vaccaro) comes to visit. She tells Joey she was happy with the way things were; she knew about the affair, but was ignoring it. In the end, Joey butts out and his dad continues seeing Ronnie and his mom continues pretending it isn't happening.

Phoebe: dates a psychiatrist, Roger (Fisher Stevens). Phoebe really likes him and the gang seems to really like him, too. That is until Roger starts psychoanalyzing everyone. The gang starts to really hate Roger and they tell Phoebe how they feel. Phoebe talks to Roger about it. Roger responds by criticizing the group. Phoebe breaks up with him.

Chandler: goes to Monica and Rachel's one morning, raiding their refrigerator. Rachel comes out from a shower, wearing only a towel. Chandler sees her boobies. Chandler is Roger's first victim; Roger tells him he uses humor to create distance with people.

Rachel: walks out of the shower and drops her towel when Chandler scares her. She's a little mad at him for seeing her boobies. Ross suggests that she'd feel better if she got to see Chandler's thing. Ronnie tells Rachel that Chandler is in the shower and Rachel goes into Chandler and Joey's bathroom, expecting to see naked Chandler, but it's Joey. Rachel tells Roger a traumatic story about Weebels being given away.

Ross: is told by Roger that he married Carol because he wanted his marriage to fail. Roger also says Ross may have married a lesbian to make up for over shadowing a sibling. Ross is not happy thinking that he subconsciously knew that Carol was a lesbian and married her to make Monica look better to their parents.

Monica: is equally upset by Roger's psychoanalysis. She eats cookies to make herself feel better. Joey walks in on her in the shower, thinking it's Rachel. Monica tries to walk in on Joey as pay-back, but walks in on Joey Sr. instead.

• Here's a more concise breakdown of all the nakedness. Chandler sees Rachel. Rachel sees Joey. Joey sees Monica. Monica sees Joey Sr.
  

• I'm honestly surprised that they haven't all seen each other naked before this point. I mean, with all the times Joey and Chandler walk in unannounced. And in the flashback episode, of how they all met, Joey takes his clothes off when Monica fixes him lemonade.
  

• I hate Fisher Stevens.

It's an irrational sort of hate. I have no reason to dislike him. I just do. Doesn't he just--just look irritating?

• This is Ronnie and Joey Sr. :
  

Joey Sr. reminds me of Danny DeVito. I can't even bring myself to talk about Ronnie's clothes. Are--are those stirrup-pants?? With cowboy boots??? I love this picture, btw, it looks like Ronnie is about to beat the crap out of Joey Sr.

• I would not stay with my husband if he had a mistress. I'm not sure if it's admirable or stupid that Joey's mom is willing to overlook it. Granted, that's probably a little heavy for a 'Friends' episode. I'm just sayin.' I do like this storyline, though. It gives Joey a chance to be mature. And it shows that there's a heart under the womanizing exterior.
  

Oh.My.God.


"That's a relatively open weave and I can still see your...nipular areas." -Chandler, after seeing Rachel's boobies.

"It was an accident. Not like I was across the street with a telescope and a box of donuts." -Chandler, explaining the boobie incident to Ross.

"Nice? They were nice. I mean, that's it? I mean, mittens are nice." -Rachel, disliking Chandler saying her boobies were only nice.

"Alright, alright. We're all adults here. There's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your pee-pee." -Ross, attempting to resolve the boobie incident between Rachel and Chandler.

"C'mon, he's right. Tit for tat."
"Well, I'm not showing you my 'tat'." -Rachel and Chandler, over whether she gets to see his 'pee-pee.'

"Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good!" -Ross, after Roger's psychoanalysis.

"Oh look, it's the woman we ordered." -Chandler, finding Ronnie outside their apartment.

"Uh, Joey's having an embolism, but I'd go for a Nip." -Chandler, after Ronnie offers a Cheese Nip.

"I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!" -Joey, after having a talk with his dad.

"I've been thinking. Y' know, about how I'm always seeing girls on top of girls..."
"Are they end to end, or tall like pancakes?" -Joey and Chandler.

"If I turn into my parents, I'll either be an alcoholic blond chasing after twenty-year-old boys, or... I'll end up like my mom." -Chandler on his future.