TOW: the Recap of Season 3

Well, Friends fans we've reached the end of another season. Season 3 is largely solid; a lot of tough issues were dealt with. It always amazes me how the show handles serious issues, like Ross and Rachel's breakup, with a mix of humor and heart. Even though we have emotional stuff to deal with, there's always something funny in the background to ease the tension. Again, I'm always shocked by how quickly the seasons seem to pass. It seems like just yesterday I did my very post, and yet tomorrow I start season four.

The Best:

TOW: No One's Ready
I'm not sure this one needs an explanation, but I'll give it anyway. The cushions are the essence of the mother freaking chair. That is all.

TOW: Frank Jr.
This has little to do with the fact that Frank Jr. exists. In fact, it almost has nothing to do with Frank Jr. What makes this one of the best, is Joey's building of the entertainment unit.

TOW: the Giant Poking Device.
There's a giant poking device. They use it to jab Ugly Naked Guy. It's awesome. Oh, Chandler and Janice breakup, and there's a great moment where Chandler and Phoebe sing Endless Love together. And--and Monica bumps Ben's head and puts him in Rainy Day Bear's outfit....it's just amazing.

TOW: Monica and Richard are Just Friends
Phoebe's boyfriend keeps showing off his goods. Joey keeps books in the freezer and reads Little Women.

TOW: the Morning After
I know it's sad, but it's just sooo good. Rachel and Ross are the right amount of heart wrenching. The others, locked in Monica's bedroom, are hilarious.


The Worst:
These are becoming harder and harder to pick out. There are few episodes that I find distasteful. For the most part, there's always something really great in every episode, but these are the ones I was least impressed by.

TOW: The Metaphorical Tunnel
It's just not exciting. I burst into gales of laughter every time I see the scene with Chandler and Janice in the grocery store, but that's not enough to make this a well-rounded entry in the season. Ross' issues with Ben's Barbie and the Bea video help, but not enough. Plus, Ross irritates me.

TOW: Ross and Rachel Take a Break
Definitely not what I'd call a bad episode, just not one of my favorites. I'm bothered by Ross's attitude towards Rachel's job, namely that he finds it so unimportant because fashion isn't something he cares about. I don't like Chloe, either. Not just because Ross sleeps with her, but because there's nothing remotely likable about the character. Her one significant aspect is that she's hot, but other than that she's boring and annoying.

TO: Without the Ski Trip
I'd probably say this was a really good way to follow up the breakup, but gah, Ross is unbelievably unreasonable. Rachel handles the fact that the group can't go to the lingerie show incredibly well, but Ross just becomes unhinged when they can't watch movies with him. I know Rachel should have been more gracious when Ross comes out to find them, but by that point I'm so irritated with Ross, I just don't care. This one gets honorable mention, though, for showing how Chandler's parent's divorce really messed him up. As a child of a pretty nasty divorce, I know what that's like, so I can totally relate to how listening to Ross and Rachel yell brings back bad memories for him.

TOW: the Screamer
The idea behind this episode, y'know a guy having anger issues, is really amazing, but it some how doesn't come together well. Having Ben Stiller play the screamer should've really made this episode, but it doesn't ever happen. Also, I hate Kate.

TOW: the Ultimate Fighting Champion
There's nothing too exciting about this episode. And I think the UFC thing is dumb. I don't think Monica should've ended up with Pete, y'know for the whole show, but I really liked him. Maybe I just think his character and their relationship deserved a better ending.

The Best Moments:

Chandler and Joey fight over the chair.

Joey, Chandler, and the electric drill.

Best Quotes:

"Look, it's Weepie! The mime who cares too much!" -Chandler, 3.01.

"Humus. I got the Humus." -Phoebe, 3.02.

"So, in the words of A.A. Milne, 'Get out of my chair, dillhole!'" -Chandler, 3.02.

"You took his underwear?"
"He took my essence!" -Ross and Chandler, 3.02.

"Look at me, I'm Chandler. I could I be wearing any more clothes?" -Joey, 3.02.

"And there--there are place you can go to get that stuff."
"Down at the docks again?" -Monica and Rachel, 3.03.

"Are you intrigued?"
"You're flingin'-flangin' right I am!" -Ross and Chandler, 3.04.

"He carries it everywhere, it's like a security blanket, but with ski boots and a kicky beret." -Susan, 3.04.

"I've scared ya! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!" -Chandler, 3.04.

"Cause Carol's a lesbian. And--and I'm not one. And apparently it's not a mix and match situation." -Ross, 3.06.

"Stupid balls are in the way." -Ross, 3.06.

"Oh, it's just like a bloodbath in here today." Rachel, 3.08

"Are you okay? Do you wanna come poke a nude guy?"- Joey, 3.08

"I'm telling you, he's dead. What we are about to have here is a dead fat guy on a stick." -Phoebe, 3.08.

"Nice try. See, the Netherlands is a make believe place where Peter Pan and Tinker Bell live." -Joey, 3.09.

"I win! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!" -Chandler, 3.09.

"All right, I'll take a box of the cream filled Jesus'." -Joey, 3.10.

"Those are some huge breasts you have." -Chandler, 3.11.

"Are you insane? I mean, Joey's going to kill you. He's actually going to kill you dead." -Monica, 3.11.

"Well, I suppose we just try not to look directly at it."
"Like an eclipse." -Ross and Chandler, 3.13.

"Hey buddy, this is a family place, put the mouse back in its house." -Gunther, 3.13.

"Jingle bitch screwed me over. Go to hell jingle whore. Go to hell, go to hell, go to hell-ell-ell." -Phoebe, 3. 14.

"Well, I should think so. You slept with someone." -Rachel, 3.16.

"What does the sign say?"
"Beam me up, Jesus." -Phoebe and Chandler, 3. 17.

"Y'know what, I can handle it. Handle's my middle name. Actually it's the uh, middle part of my first name." -Chandler, 3.17.

"Oh, I'm sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someone else?" -Rachel, 3.17.

"Yeah, either that or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually the rhythm is going to get you." -Chandler, 3.19.

"Is it just me, or does 'subletting my peephole' sound kinda dirty?" -Chandler, 3.19.

"Come dinosaur, we're not welcome in the house of no imagination." -Phoebe, 3.20.

"Ah, we met on the plane. She asked me if she could finish off my peanuts, I thought she said something else, we had a big laugh." -Pete, 3.21.

"What? Is it a pimple?"
"No, it's...fancier than a pimple." -Ross and Chandler, 3.23.

"Thank you, but I want to remove it, Pheebs, I don't want to make it savory." -Ross, 3.23.

"Rach, you balded my girlfriend!" -Ross, 3.25.

TOW: the Recap of Season 2

Well, folks, it's season recaping time again!! Season Two has come and gone--there were smiles, there were tears, and a freaking awesome crazy roommate. I can't believe I've already made my way through another twenty-four episodes. My brain refuses to comprehend. But anyhoo, let's go over the fantastic and the, uh, not so fantastic of season two.

The Best:
TOW:Ross's New Girlfriend
The season premier begins the Ross-Rachel-Julie love triangle. However, this is not the only awesomeness this episode has to offer. In fact, it is in this episode that we are introduced to Joey's tailor.

TOW:Ross Finds Out
This is, by far, the best Ross and Rachel episode of the season. Rachel drunkenly calls Ross talking about closure. Ross is supposed to get a cat with Julie...it's like the epitome of the Ross and Rachel thing. I kinda wanna make-out with this episode, it's that great.

TO: After the Superbowl
This epic two part episode makes my heart happy. It's overrun with guest stars from Brooke Shields to Julia Roberts and Jean-Claude Van Damme. Plus, Joey's got a stalker, Marcel's back, Monica and Rachel fight, and Chandler wears panties. Golden. Okay, one thing does bother me, though, and that's that the title is not TOW, but TO. Stupid, I know, but it feels wrong just typing it.

TOW: the Prom Video
The title says it all. PROM VIDEO. We get Fat Monica, ubber dork Ross, and pre-nose job Rachel. Ugh, it's perfect. Oh, and Ross and Rachel kiss. Plus, Joey gets Chandler the bracelet and Phoebe talks about lobsters.

TOW: Eddie Won't Go
By far my favorite Eddie episode, he really lets the crazy fly. From watching Chandler sleep to the mannequin head, he's all the right amounts of psycho and entertaining. Also, Joey moves back in


The Worst:
Here's the thing about season two--it's a pretty sound entry in the Friends oeuvre. Not all of the episodes are what I would categorize as great, but most of them are good. It was actually kinda difficult to come up with sub-par episodes. There are elements of most of these episodes that I liked, but they just didn't live up to the other entries in the season.

TOW: Five Steaks and an Eggplant
This is the exception to, like, everything I said above. I might go as far as to say I hate this episode. It's a combination of having seen it too much and it not being very entertaining. I like that they address the income discrepancies between the friends, but it's just not very funny. The best part is probably the Chandler and Jade thing, but barely half the episode is devoted to that storyline.

TOW: Joey Moves Out
This is on here only because Joey moves out and it makes me sad. There are several good moments in this episode, like with Joey licking the silverware, but I'm mostly eh about the tattoos and the stuff at the Geller's.

TOW: Old Yeller Dies
This episode is okay. I just don't like it because Richard's so disappointed when he learns that Chandler and Joey see him as a father figure. I like the stuff with Phoebe and the movies, but eh.

TOW: The Bullies
I've definitely seen this one too often. Plus, I'm not too interested in Monica or Phoebe's stuff. The Bullies are entertaining, but not enough to sustain multiple viewing of this episode.

TOW: Two Parties
Another one suffering from 'I've seen it too often' syndrome.

The Best Moments:
Joey's Tailor

Ross finds out and Ross and Rachel's first kiss

The prom video and Monica's creepy interview

Best Quotes

"I mean isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?" -Rachel, episode 2.01

"When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me." -Rachel, episode 2.01

"Did they go to the zoo? Supposably." -Joey, episode 2.03

"Why, yes, Ross, pushing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia." -Chandler, episode 2.04

"Ok, ok, uh, ducks is heads because ducks have heads."
"What kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday?" -Joey and Chandler, episode 2.06

"He can press her up against the window as much as he wants. For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing." -Rachel, episode 2.07

"And, you know, ya see there, I'm thinking of names, so obviously, I am over you. I am over you. And that, my friend, is what they call closure." -Rachel, episode 2.07

"Both? BOTH!? I can't have two cats! Joey's the kind of guy who could have two cats." -Ross, episode 2.07

"You know, this is actually good, because if we ever lose Ross, we have a spare." -Chandler, episode 2.10

"Well, now you understand how I feel every single day, ok? The world is my lesbian wedding." -Chandler, episode 2.11

"Because she's your lobster." -Phoebe, episode 2.14

"We're not Bert and Ernie."
"Yeah, I know we're not gay puppets." -Joey and Chandler, episode 2.16

"Was that the oven timer?"
"That's right my friend. It's time for..."
"BAYWATCH!!!" -Joey and Chandler, episode 2.17

"Well, that's not even a real fish. No, that's a goldfish cracker." -Chandler, episode 2.18

"This is not out of the blue, this is smack dab in the middle of the blue!" -Chandler, episode 2.19

"Because it reminded you of the way our forefathers used to bitch at each other?" -Chandler, episode 2.22

"Sorry, we're on a major flan high." -Chandler, episode 2.22

"That'll teach you to lick my muffin." -Monica, episode 2.23



First episode of season 3 on Monday!!