TOW: Ross's Wedding

Before leaving NYC

Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Ross have four hours before they need to be at the airport. That doesn't stop Monica from becoming a complete basket case about when they need to leave, though. She runs over to Chandler and Joey's to hurry them along. Monica goes back to her apartment, and starts packing things in her purse. Every time she puts an item in she says, 'check!'. Phoebe and Rachel make fun of her, but Monica didn't realize it was weird, because Mrs. Geller always used to do it. Ross comes in, doing the 'check!' thing, too. Chandler and Joey start to leave their apartment, but Joey's left his passport in his room. Monica tells Phoebe where she keeps all her cleaning stuff; Rachel doesn't know where the stuff is because she never cleans. The four going to London prepare to leave, but Phoebe wants hugs. She can't get up off the couch, so she has them come to her; she also asks them to bring her stuff she's left in the kitchen or over at Chandler and Joey's. Ross hugs Rachel good-bye, asking her again to come to his wedding. She says she can't because she has to work. Ross is totally disappointed, and tells her she can just watch the video. Monica breaks into all the hoopla to let them know they're really going to be late if they don't get a move on. After they leave, Rachel is sad. Phoebe offers her a hug, with no 'bring me ______" favors attached.

Arriving in London

Chandler and Joey: They leave their hotel, ready to do some sight-seeing, but Joey will not leave Chandler alone with the video camera. They're going to visit Westminster Abbey; to find the way, Joey pulls up a pop-up map of London. Chandler's horrified by this turn of events, but it gets worse as Joey puts the map on the sidewalk, proceeding to step on it to get his directional bearings. One can only assume that Joey finds the way; as he walks along he holds his pop-up map directly in front of him. Chandler's super embarrassed, and makes fun of Joey. Joey loses the way, and has to 'go into' his map again. There's a montage of Chandler and Joey doing touristy-y, London, stuff. Through out, Chandler is embarrassed by Joey's obviously a tourist actions. They finally get to Westminster, but Chandler is grouchy. He won't be on camera when Joey tries to film him and his thoughts on the Abbey. Their sight-seeing in London continues, and really only gets worse. At a street vendor cart, Joey picks up a Dr. Seuss hat with the Union Jack on it. Chandler's had enough, and tells Joey he can't buy the hat. Joey wants the hat, though, and he thinks he looks awesome. He goes ahead and buys it, even though Chandler says he won't hang around with Joey for the rest of the day if he's wearing the hat. If that wasn't bad enough, Chandler trips over some merchandise at another vendor cart, and falls into a display of flowers. After Chandler leaves, Joey introduces himself to some random British dude. Chandler's in the hotel room, trying to kick his shoes into a trash can, when Joey comes back (still wearing the hat). Chandler apologizes for being a jerk, saying he had a horrible day. Joey accepts the apology, but had a great day. He plays his video for Chandler, and we see Joey chatting up Duchess Sarah Ferguson. Fergie says she likes Joey's hat, and Joey hits on her, only to get shot down. Chandler wants to know how Joey met Fergie, but we never learn because Monica and Ross get into an argument.

Ross and Monica: are walking down a residential street in London. They are on their way to the building where they're having the wedding. While they walk, Emily details everything that's gone wrong with the wedding plans. The florist doesn't have tulips, and the caterer had to change the kind of chicken that was on the menu. Ross is trying to make her feel better, but Monica starts talking about how Emily'd be better off going with salmon. Ross keeps giving her dirty looks and kicking her, so she doesn't upset Emily more than she already is. Emily explains again why having the wedding in this particular building is important to her (it's pretty and her parents were married there). She points out the building to Monica, only to see that it's partially torn down. Emily and Ross run into the main room of the building; it's a mess with the roof gone, and piles of brick everywhere. Emily's horrified, especially when Monica comes back with the news that the crew decided to tear it down early (uhh, obviously). Emily and Monica go to a dress shop, so Monica can be fitted for her bridesmaid dress. Emily's flipping out about the building being torn down. Monica tries to reassure her that a new venue will be found, but Emily's in full panic mode. She's certain they won't be able to find another place to hold the wedding; it's on too short of notice, and all the good places will be gone, anyway. Monica points out that postponing the wedding isn't such a bad thing. If they move it back a little, Emily will be able to have the flowers and food she wants, instead of settling. This makes Emily feel much better. Emily goes to Ross's hotel room, where he informs her that Mr. Waltham thinks they'll be able to find a new place for the wedding. Emily tells Ross it's okay if they don't have a place, she's willing to postpone the wedding. Ross freaks, not wanting to put it off. He's upset because of all the money spent on wedding plans, and that his friends and family traveled all the way to London. Emily thinks they'll all come back, glad to allow Ross and Emily the chance to do the wedding their way. During the fight, Ross keeps putting on his pants backwards. Emily gets frustrated with Ross's attitude, and informs him that if he doesn't understand the importance of the wedding, then maybe they shouldn't be getting married. She stalks off, and Ross tries to follow, but closes his thing in his zipper and is immobilized by pain. Ross finds Monica in Chandler and Joey's room. Monica thinks Ross is going to thank her for calming Emily down, but Ross has to come to yell at her. He wants Monica to fix the thing between him and Emily. Monica explains that Emily was upset because she'd been envisioning her perfect wedding day since she was a little girl. What hurt Emily even more was the fact that, in her wedding fantasy, the man she was marrying understood why having the perfect wedding was important. Ross asks Monica to help him make it up to Emily. Monica takes Emily to the half torn down building, but Emily's not particularly happy about it. When they walk in the main room, Ross plugs in the strings of lights hung around the room. He and Monica describe how they can still make the wedding perfect, even if there's no ceiling. Ross and Emily kiss, and Monica's sad because she doesn't have a date.

Phoebe and Rachel: Rachel comes home to find Phoebe squirming all around on the couch. She's been doing as much as possible for Phoebe, insuring that Phoebe doesn't have to get off the couch that often. Rachel rushes over to help, but Phoebe only has a wedgie. Phoebe wants to talk about lunch plans, but is distracted because Rachel seems upset. Rachel explains that she's upset over how she left things with Ross; he seemed really hurt when she wouldn't come to the wedding. Rachel also feels bad for lying about having to work. Phoebe commiserates with Rachel, saying she'd be upset, too, if a person she was still in love with was getting married. Rachel starts arguing about still being in love with Ross. She says she still has feelings, loving feelings, for him, but she isn't in love with him. This goes on for awhile, until she slips, saying she's still in love with Ross. Once she says it, Rachel knows it's true, and is horrified. She's upset with Phoebe for not mentioning that Rachel was still in love with him before, but Phoebe thought (actually, everyone but Ross) thought Rachel knew. Rachel goes on a big shopping trip to get her mind off Ross, but it doesn't work. Phoebe thinks she knows the perfect way to get Rachel over Ross, and has Rachel bring a picture of Ross over to the couch. Phoebe wants Rachel to think of all the bad things about Ross. Phoebe starts describing a scenario, but it doesn't work. Phoebe decides she needs to take more a drastic measure in the form of aversion therapy. Phoebe makes Rachel look at the picture of Ross, then smacks Rachel in the head. This doesn't work either. Phoebe finally thinks of a real flaw of Ross'; he pops his gum. Rachel can't accept it as a flaw, because she does it, too. Rachel asks Phoebe if she knows where the duck food is. When Phoebe answers in the affirmative, then asks 'why?', Rachel informs her that she's going to London. Her plan is to tell Ross how she feels, so he has all the information before he marries Emily. Phoebe tries to convince Rachel not to go, but Rachel's mind is made up. Phoebe points out that Ross loves Emily, and that Rachel's going because she hopes Ross will say he loves her, too. Phoebe explains that Ross loves Emily, and that Rachel really, really can't go; she'll ruin the wedding. Rachel leaves, and Phoebe's too pregnant to run after her. Phoebe gets in a fight with the Waltham's housekeeper (June Whitfield). She calls for Emily, to tell Emily and Ross that Rachel's coming, but the housekeeper scolds her on her phone etiquette, and hangs up. Phoebe calls back, speaking with a British accent. The housekeeper tells her Emily's not at home, and that she's not at liberty to give out a number where Emily can be reached. Phoebe threatens the housekeeper, who hangs up.

Rehearsal Dinner and Wedding

Joey: gets really homesick after talking to Phoebe, who has just ordered 'the Joey special' (two pizzas). When they hang up the phone, Joey watches the intro to Cheers, making himself super homesick. He doesn't understand the food they have at the rehearsal dinner. He asks Chandler if they can go home, but obviously the can't. Joey gives a toast during the dinner, but won't stop talking about home. He feels better when the cute bridesmaid he's sitting by, Felicity (Olivia Williams), hits on him. Joey comes home the next morning, while Chandler's in the shower. The phone rings, and it's Phoebe. She tells him that Rachel's coming to ruin the wedding. When Chandler's out of the shower, he and Joey have a strange conversation about where Monica is; Joey wants to know because he wants to tell her about Rachel. At the wedding hall, Joey tells Monica the plan to watch out for Rachel. He starts putting his part into action, but he's distracted by Felicity. They start making out, and Joey misses Rachel's entrance. At the wedding, Joey holds up Mrs. Waltham's cell phone, so Phoebe can listen.

Phoebe: spends most of this time trying to talk to Chandler, Joey, or Monica, about Rachel coming to London. She can't get anyone on the phone, at first because of the housekeeper, but then because Mrs. Waltham (Jennifer Saunders) hangs up on her. She finally talks to Joey, explaining about Rachel. She listens to the ceremony on Mrs. Waltham's cell phone.

Monica and Chandler: Monica's been pretty weepy about Ross getting married for most of the episode. It gets worse when they up with Mrs. Geller at the rehearsal dinner. Mrs. Geller won't stop making snide comments about Monica not being married yet, or having a boyfriend. Chandler's night isn't going too well, either. His toast to Ross and Emily bombed, and he's embarrassed. They end up comforting one another about their failures of the night, but it just gets worse for Monica. A drunk man comes up to her and compliments her on what a nice guy Ross is--he thinks Monica is Ross's mom. Monica's humiliated, deciding no man will ever want her. Chandler tries to comfort her, but Monica's too busy pitying herself. The next morning, Ross bounces into Chandler's hotel room to announce he's getting married. Chandler's still in bed. When Ross leaves, Monica sits up beside him. They proceed to have some awkward, morning after conversation. Joey asks Chandler if he's seen Monica, and Chandler freaks out over the question. The same thing happens when Joey asks Monica where Chandler is at the wedding. Chandler misses Rachel because he's helping Ross practice saying "I do." Monica and Chandler walk down the aisle together. They discuss how wrong spending the night together was, then make plans for later.

Rachel: gets to the ticket counter at the airport. She learns there's one seat left on the next flight to London, but it's $2700 for the ticket. She doesn't think she has the much money on her credit card, but the ticket agent (Jane Carr) says Rachel can split the cost between cards; Rachel gives her five to use. The agent then asks for Rachel's passport, but Rachel's left it at the apartment. Rachel attempts to bribe the ticket agent, but to no avail. She runs home, and Phoebe tells her how proud she is that Rachel decided not to go through with it. Rachel's not heard anything of what Phoebe said, running right back out once she finds her passport. Back at the airport, Rachel has another run in with the ticket agent. The flight Rachel wanted to take already left the airport, so Rachel wants the ticket agent to call it back. The agent can't do that, and closes her ticket counter when Rachel won't leave her alone. Rachel finally gets on a flight, but is really fidgety. The guy (Hugh Laurie) she's sitting by asks her to stop, and she tries to tell him about Ross. He doesn't care. She ends up telling the whole story to the guy across the aisle. Hugh Laurie breaks in out of frustration. He agrees with Phoebe, Rachel shouldn't be going to London. Rachel explains that Emily is just a rebound. Hugh tells Rachel that it sounds like she and Ross were on a break. Rachel gets to the church, not stopped by anyone. She goes to the main room of the building, witnessing a kiss between Ross and Emily. When Emily leaves, Ross turns to Rachel; he's incredibly happy she decided to come to the wedding. They hug, and Rachel tries to tell him how she feels, but can't. She congratulates him, and Ross goes off to do his groom thing.

Ross: gets pulled into an argument between the Waltham's and the Geller's. His parents agreed to split the wedding with the Waltham's. Mr. Waltham (Tom Conti) gives Mr. Geller an itemized bill for half the expenses. When Mr. Gellar goes through the bill, he realizes he's being charged for renovations the Waltham's did on their house. Mr. Gellar refuses to pay, and wants to fight with Mr. Waltham, but Ross intervenes. Ross goes between both men, negotiating what Mr. Geller will pay for. Ross does this because he doesn't want Emily to be upset before the wedding. He gets the parent's down to one item they're still disagreeing over, and everyone decides to let it go until after the wedding. On the big day, Mr. Geller and Mr. Waltham fight over the bill. Emily shows turns up while they're fighting, and gets dragged into the mess. Ross comes upon the argument, and forces the family's to stop fighting by refusing them grandchildren. Emily's concerned that Ross has seen her in her dress before the wedding, but he assures her that nothing will go wrong. They kiss. When Emily leaves, Ross notices that Rachel's there. He's really happy she came. The ceremony starts out well, except for the fact that Joey's holding up a cell phone so Phoebe can hear. Emily says her vows, and Ross starts his. The only problem? He says Rachel instead of Emily.

• This is one of the greatest episodes OF ALL TIME. It's funny, it's poignant, but most of all --it's surprising.

• When traveling, I'm much like Monica. This was an upsetting realization.

• I don't get why Ross is so mad at Rachel for not coming. I mean, I understand he's disappointed, but you'd think that it'd occur to him that Rachel might be upset about him getting married.

• Joey standing on his map has always reminded me of Blue's Clues. Because Blue and Steve could go into paintings and stuff.

• This wedding is obviously ill-fated. Caterer fail? Check. Florist fail? Check. Building torn down a few days early? Check.

• Honestly, who starts tearing down a building a few days early when a wedding is scheduled there?

Also, three random people would not be allowed to run into a building that could collapse with little provocation.

• I'm a little embarrassed by Joey's hat. Not the Union Jack, so much as the Dr. Seussical proportions.

A lot of people thought this look was awesome. Somehow, I think it has a lot to do with that MTV VJ, Jessie....

• I've always thought what Monica and Ross do at the building was really sweet.

It's amazing how much night and Christmas lights improve the looks of a room.

• It's pretty awesome that Phoebe would bodily prevent Rachel from going to London if she wasn't pregnant. You know she totally would, too. Remember "you guys are like my bitches."

• The housekeeper is amazing.

• Jennifer Saunders makes me happy. She's so daffy.

• I don't like the whole, Joey being homesick thing. It's not like he's staying in London for an extended visit. It's, like, a week. Anyway, it's unnecessary.

• This is one of the best moments in, like, all of TV history, let alone this episode.

I remember watching this the night it aired, but I can't remember how surprising it was that Chandler and Monica ended up in bed together. I think it's epic.

• I love Hugh Laurie.
  

I don't watch House, because I decide that I have what ever disease they talk about that episode, but Hugh Laurie is, like, the best misanthrope ever.

• Y'know, Ross, practicing your 'I do' with Chandler didn't really help. Maybe practice saying 'Emily' next time.

• Those are some big boobs Emily has.

This gown looks so different on Emily. I honestly thought it was a different one from the one Monica wears. I'm glad she ditched that hideous veil.

• When Rachel doesn't tell Ross she loves him, I mist up a little.

It's so well done. You can totally tell that she's aching to say the words, but at the last moment she realizes she can't ruin Ross's wedding day. It reminds me of Roman Holiday.

• Tough questions, guys. If you were Rachel, would you tell? If you were Ross, would you want to know? Phoebe's right about Rachel telling because she wants Ross to return her feelings. It's very selfish to want to tell...that's not saying I don't understand the motivation. Sometimes I think I'd want to know, if I were in Ross's place. Other times I think it'd complicate things unnecessarily.
  

• The wedding music has always bothered me. It sounds like something out of Lord of the Rings. Which is good in LOTR, but not so much in Friends.

• Speaking of TV history...

Oh. My. God.

"Six hour trip to London. That's a lot of Monica." -Chandler, while Monica freaks out about being late.

"Yeah, my mom used to put her head in the oven. Well, actually, she only did it the one time. But it was pretty weird." -Phoebe, to Monica, about the weird 'check!' thing.

"LONDON, BABY!!!" -Joey, being excited.

"Okay, if you see a little version of me in there, KILL IT!" -Chandler, to Joey, when he 'goes into the map'.

"Well, up yours, too!" -Emily, to Ross, because of 'time-out' hand gesture confusion.

"How's it going to be alright?"

"Uh-huh, I see that." -Emily and Ross, when the building's partially torn down.

"Hands down, the best Abbey I've ever seen." -Joey's thoughts on Westminster Abbey.

"Man, you are Westminster Crabby!" -Joey, to Chandler.

"Well, because we thought you knew! It's so obvious! God, that would be like telling Monica, 'hey, you like things clean'." -Phoebe, to Rachel, on why the gang never mentioned Rachel still loved Ross.

"Well, I don't have to buy that, 'I'm with stupid.' t-shirt anymore." -Chandler, to Joey, about his hat.

"Don't you point your pants at me!" -Emily, to Ross, while they're fighting over postponing the wedding, and Ross can't put his pants on right.

"Manhattan does not have enough stores." -Rachel, to Phoebe, about how well shopping helped her not think about Ross.

"Well, I like you less." -Rachel, to Phoebe, after the aversion therapy.

"You're even dumber than I am." -Monica, to Ross, about Emily postponing the wedding.

"And that--that pillowcase thing, I thought you guys were just doing the Flying Nun."

"Sometimes we were." -Ross and Monica, about why young girls wore pillowcases on their heads.

"No! Because he's in love with the British chippy!" -Phoebe, to Rachel, about why she shouldn't go to London.

"It's not over until someone says, 'I do'."

"I do! I do!" -Rachel and Phoebe, about telling Ross.

"Ugh, like I can really chase you. I'm carrying a litter." -Phoebe, after Rachel leaves.

"She's very self-absorbed, you know. I should never have married her." -Mr. Waltham, when his wife ignores the Gellers.

"You're different here, too. You're mean in England!" -Joey, to Chandler, when Chandler tries to comfort homesick Joey.

"Why am I always pregnant when she does that!?" -Phoebe, after Rachel comes back for her passport, and leaves again.

"Of course, my big toast will be tomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast, or Melba toast, if you will." -Chandler's toast.

"I was laughing."

"Out loud?"

"Well, I didn't want everyone to think I was stupid." -Monica and Chandler, about his toast.

"You thieving, would be speaking German if it weren't for us, cheap little man!" -Mr. Geller, to Mr. Waltham, during the fight over the bill.

"He came up to me earlier, and thanked me for my very moving performance in Titanic." -Chandler, trying to comfort Monica after the drunk guy thinks she's Ross's mom.

"Do you think he knew I was here?" -Monica, to Chandler, after Ross comes in.

"Well, I've--I've never done that with you before." -Chandler, to Monica, after Ross leaves.

"No!! Okay!! What's with the third degree?! Why don't you just shine a light in my eyes?!" -Chandler, to Joey, who keeps asking where Monica is.

"You know, I just want to say--that you are a horrible, horrible person." -Passenger, to Rachel, about her plans to tell Ross how she feels.

"And by the way, it seems perfectly clear that you were on a break." -Passenger, to Rachel.

"Take thee, Rachel..." -Ross, repeating his wedding vows.

"Uhh, shall I go on?" -the Minister, after Ross says the wrong name.