Joey, Ross, Chandler, and Monica: Joey and Ross are playing catch across Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey realizes they've been throwing the ball for over an hour without dropping it. Joey and Ross decide to see how long they can keep throwing the ball. Joey ends up needing to use the bathroom, only Rachel's using it. He and Ross go across the hall and continue throwing the ball as Joey uses the restroom. Monica comes in, looking for her watch so she can go to work. Ross and Joey don't pay much attention to her, but she yells at them and takes their ball. They start freaking out, they'd been throwing it successfully for 2 hours and 27 minutes. The fact that they've been throwing the ball without dropping it for such a long time intrigues Monica; she gets in on the game, calling in sick to work. When Chandler comes in after dealing with Phoebe and Gary, he learns they've been throwing the ball for over four hours. He wants to play, too, but everyone is reluctant. Chandler, you see, is a 'dropper'. He argues with them, and they go ahead and let him play. The longer the game goes on it becomes clear that Monica, in pure, unadulterated Monica form, is taking it too seriously. After ten hours of throwing the ball, everyone wants to stop except for Monica. The guys are all tired and hungry, but instead of quitting, Monica leads them to her apartment for leftover pizza. The next morning they're still throwing the ball when Phoebe comes in to tell them about ending it with Gary. In an effort to cheer Phoebe up, Joey throws the ball to her. Phoebe's not in the mood to play, so she sets the ball down on the table. A collective gasp rises from Monica, Chandler, Joey, Ross, and Rachel. Monica says they can still play; that Phoebe putting the ball down doesn't count, but no one wants to keep going. Rachel decides they need to go out for breakfast. Monica suggests they should race to the restaurant, and runs out the door. The others decide to eat at home.
Rachel: In a moment of insanity Rachel buys a hairless cat. She comes home with it, telling Ross and Joey how she impulsively bought it, knowing Monica wouldn't like it. The cat (named Mrs. Whiskerson), cost Rachel $1,000; Ross and Joey don't know why she paid so much for something so ugly. Rachel's too excited--she always wanted a hairless cat, because her grandma had one and it was sweet--to let the guys ruin her fun. Rachel goes across the hall where Joey, Ross, and Monica are playing. She's covered in scratches, telling them that the cat (which Monica knew nothing about) is horrible. It's taciturn, mean, and hisses at her menacingly when she gets too close. She leaves, but comes back later carrying the cat on his pillow and wearing oven mitts. She's decided she doesn't want the cat anymore but the store won't give Rachel her money back, only exchange the cat for store credit. Joey suggests Rachel show the cat, but she isn't interested. Monica tells her she can keep the cat until she finds it a new home, but Rachel's more upset about losing $1,000. She tries to sell the cat on the street, but it doesn't go well. One lady thinks the hairless cat is a baby, another wants to buy the cat, but Rachel expects her to pay $2000 for it. When the ball throwing group comes in for pizza, Rachel's sitting at the kitchen table, catless. She sold it to Gunther for $1500.
- Gunther is one gullible son of a bitch.
- For some reason when I was younger, I thought it was sweet how much Gunther liked Rachel. Now, he seems like a creeper.
- The Sphinx Cat.
I think it should continue its existence in statue form only. And in Egypt.
- Maybe the cat hates Rachel cause she named it Mrs. Whiskerson. Just sayin'.
- This strains the bonds of friendship.
- Chandler's fear of commitment is getting really tired.
- I love that Monica's obsessed with getting to work on time, but calls in sick to throw a plastic ball around. I guess everyone has their priorities.
- Monica isn't very mad about that cat existing in her apartment, but she is upset cause Rachel owed her money.
- When a Cop Pouts.
- Chandler is definitely a dropper.
- I thought animal allergies had to do with dander from pet hair, but Monica say the hairless cat aggravates her allergies. Confounded.
- It bothers me that Gary knows Phoebe's unhappy about agreeing for them to move in together, but doesn't say anything until his little interrogation stunt.
- Chicken or hairless cat?
- It frustrates me that Rachel doesn't just put an add in the mother-effing newspaper.
- It is supersupersupersuper lame that Gary's storyline ends because he shoots a bird. He deserves so much better. It's like the writer's got sick of him, and ended him in the easiest, dumbest way possible.
- I heart the reaction when Phoebe puts the ball down.
I don't think it should count, because technically no one dropped it.
- I would not still be throwing that damn ball after twelve hours. I'm not entirely sure that it's physically possible.
- At the end of the ep, there's a montage of Chandler dropping things. I love.
The Magna Doodle Says
It's a spaceship. Surrounded by stars and other space paraphernalia.
Oh. My. God.
"I just bought something I'm not sure she's gonna like, and it's gonna seem a little crazy, but this is something that I wanted since I was a little girl."
"You bought Shawn Cassidy!?" -Rachel and Ross, before Rachel shows them the hairless cat.
"Why is it inside out?" -Ross, about the cat.
"Well, what am I gonna call her!? Fluffy!?" -Rachel, defending the name Mrs. Whiskerson.
"Don't you see, if you lived with Phoebe she's always gonna be there. You're gonna get home, she's there. You go to bed, she's there. You wake up and oh yes, she's there!" -Chandler, to Gary, about why he shouldn't want to move in with Phoebe.
"Alright, come on, I'm--I'm late for work!"
"How do you know? You don't have a watch." -Monica and Ross, while Monica's getting ready for work.
"Congratulations, that's quite a waste of time." -Rachel, to Ross, Joey, and Monica, after learning they haven't dropped the ball for three hours.
"And I swear, I know this sounds crazy, but every time that cat hisses at me I know it's saying 'Rachel'." -Rachel, explaining why the cat isn't awesome.
"You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right!" -Phoebe, to Chandler, when he suggests she move in with Gary.
"It's really a three person game, y'know?"
"It's throwing and catching!" -Ross and Chandler, when they won't let Chandler play cause he's a dropper.
"Maybe that's because she's a minion of the anti-Christ." -Chandler, about Rachel's cat.
"Well, they said that would, but they would only give me store credit. I mean, what am I going to do, get a thousand regular cats?" -Rachel, explaining why she hasn't taken the cat back to the store.
"I'm out a thousand dollars, I'm all scratched up, and I'm stuck with this stupid cat that looks like a hand!" -Rachel, on why she's upset.
"Don't--don't throw it to me! My vision's been compromised!" -Monica, having an allergic reaction to the cat.
"Man, that was close."
"Yeah, you almost overreacted to something." -Monica and Chandler, after her allergic reaction.
"The oven mitts really freaked me out." -Phoebe, to Rachel, when Rachel comes in wearing oven mitts and carrying her cat.
"Are these for rent? I thought people were just bragging." -Phoebe, to Gary, when he points out all the apartment listings in Brooklyn Heights.
"Please! I made this game what it is!"
"Not fun anymore?" -Monica and Chandler, after they'd been throwing the ball for ten hours.
"Rachel, what is your cat doing in one of my bowls!?"
"It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken." -Monica and Rachel. Rachel knows how to make chicken?
"So what is this? Some kind of snake or something?" -Gunther, after coming by to get the cat's pillow.